I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
