So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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