People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
