here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
My vagina just clenched in fear
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
