I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
