piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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