theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
You're like the curious george of whores
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
