Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
