I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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