Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
we're making bets on your personal life
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
