the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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