Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Every concussion has its silver lining
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
