if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
you told grandpa to call you daddy
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize