He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize