those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
