Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
