I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
