just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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