Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
