White coat. Heels.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize