Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
