everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
