I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Randomize
