She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
