We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
