Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
