Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
