Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
