oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
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