Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
