..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
you win again, gameday.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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