She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
