We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
