He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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