I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
worst night to have a conscience
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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