I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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