yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize