cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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