I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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