is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize