I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Panties = found
Randomize
