I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I skipped work to stalk him.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
