Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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