Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
