We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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