No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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