Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize