He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
