I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
