He asked to "fluff my boner.."
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize