I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Can i not drive my cunt home
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
