K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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